They Say Only 10% Of The Brain’s Function Is Known.
Apparently, The Function Of The Remaining 90%
Is To Keep Us From Discovering It’s Function!
Now, it’s not my intention to rain on anyone’s parade.
In fact, I’m leaning more towards drowning out the parade altogether.
I'll never understand the attraction people have towards holidays.
Let's get something straight.
Holidays are Big Business, conceived through corporate greed,
having taken the true meaning and spirit of the day and twisted the story
to the point that you feel obligated to literally throw
your money away buying things.
Stop feeding the machine.
You’re so locked in to it that you knowingly and willingly
spend huge amounts of money on ridicules junk.
Stop celebrating Holidays, and Start Celebrating Life.
Every Day that you wake up to a new day is cause to celebrate.
Don’t wait for a Holiday to Celebrate, because you never know
when your destination is gonna sneak up behind you
and bite you in the butt.
So, why am I ranting on about holidays?
Because, you love holidays and I love how absolutely ridiculous they are.
(...and they make for some great material!)
MARCH
has Daylight Saving Time!
Now, while it's not really a holiday, it should be
simply because it's total nonsense..
as are Most Holidays.That's why!
WHEN THRIFTY Benjamin Franklin spotted a chance to save precious tallow, he didn't hesitate to pipe up.
(and, we're not talkin' tabacco)
Franklin suggested that people adjust their sleep schedules in the summer months to enjoy the "economy of using sunshine rather than candles." He jokingly proposed firing cannons to wake people at dawn and imposing a tax on window shutters that keep out sunlight. (funny guy,huh?)
If only there was a mandate requiring: that anyone in public office must "pipe up," before making any life changing decisions.. we'd all be in the land of OZ or Wonderland!
One thing for sure.... It would be a lot more fun!
Cutting energy consumption--whether because of wartime shortages, oil embargoes, or global warming, has always been the justification for the abuse of American sleep schedules.
But a new study from the
National Bureau of Economic Research,
finds that daylight saving time,
actually increases demand for energy.
The paper, by the economist Michael J. Kotchen and the environmental scientist Laura E. Grant, takes advantage of a natural experiment in Indiana.
The state use to harbor several counties in open rebellion against daylight saving time,
but that came to an end in 2006, when a federal mandate forced the counties to fall into line.
Kotchen and Grant estimate that the change cost $9 million a year in higher electricity bills and $1.7 million to $5.5 million a year in pollution emissions.
They say the effect is likely to be stronger in other, less temperate parts of the United States.
A federal Mandate?
Are these people completely out of their minds?
Of course not! They're just looking out for their own personal selfish interests......MONEY! (which, by the way...comes out of your pockets!)
And, you'll never find anyone who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we observe Standard Time and not Daylight Savings Time all year long.
So.. you ask, "What do they do with all the saved
Daylight Time?"
I have it on good authority that someone from
Alaska has been stealing it for a long long time!
So, In the tradition, that has made this country
the greatest place on the planet...
HAPPY DAYLIGHT SAVING TIME.
9
Apparently, The Function Of The Remaining 90%
Is To Keep Us From Discovering It’s Function!
Now, it’s not my intention to rain on anyone’s parade.
In fact, I’m leaning more towards drowning out the parade altogether.
I'll never understand the attraction people have towards holidays.
Let's get something straight.
Holidays are Big Business, conceived through corporate greed,
having taken the true meaning and spirit of the day and twisted the story
to the point that you feel obligated to literally throw
your money away buying things.
Stop feeding the machine.
You’re so locked in to it that you knowingly and willingly
spend huge amounts of money on ridicules junk.
Stop celebrating Holidays, and Start Celebrating Life.
Every Day that you wake up to a new day is cause to celebrate.
Don’t wait for a Holiday to Celebrate, because you never know
when your destination is gonna sneak up behind you
and bite you in the butt.
So, why am I ranting on about holidays?
Because, you love holidays and I love how absolutely ridiculous they are.
(...and they make for some great material!)
MARCH
has Daylight Saving Time!
Now, while it's not really a holiday, it should be
simply because it's total nonsense..
as are Most Holidays.That's why!
WHEN THRIFTY Benjamin Franklin spotted a chance to save precious tallow, he didn't hesitate to pipe up.
(and, we're not talkin' tabacco)
Franklin suggested that people adjust their sleep schedules in the summer months to enjoy the "economy of using sunshine rather than candles." He jokingly proposed firing cannons to wake people at dawn and imposing a tax on window shutters that keep out sunlight. (funny guy,huh?)
If only there was a mandate requiring: that anyone in public office must "pipe up," before making any life changing decisions.. we'd all be in the land of OZ or Wonderland!
One thing for sure.... It would be a lot more fun!
Cutting energy consumption--whether because of wartime shortages, oil embargoes, or global warming, has always been the justification for the abuse of American sleep schedules.
But a new study from the
National Bureau of Economic Research,
finds that daylight saving time,
actually increases demand for energy.
The paper, by the economist Michael J. Kotchen and the environmental scientist Laura E. Grant, takes advantage of a natural experiment in Indiana.
The state use to harbor several counties in open rebellion against daylight saving time,
but that came to an end in 2006, when a federal mandate forced the counties to fall into line.
Kotchen and Grant estimate that the change cost $9 million a year in higher electricity bills and $1.7 million to $5.5 million a year in pollution emissions.
They say the effect is likely to be stronger in other, less temperate parts of the United States.
A federal Mandate?
Are these people completely out of their minds?
Of course not! They're just looking out for their own personal selfish interests......MONEY! (which, by the way...comes out of your pockets!)
And, you'll never find anyone who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we observe Standard Time and not Daylight Savings Time all year long.
So.. you ask, "What do they do with all the saved
Daylight Time?"
I have it on good authority that someone from
Alaska has been stealing it for a long long time!
So, In the tradition, that has made this country
the greatest place on the planet...
HAPPY DAYLIGHT SAVING TIME.
9
BY AND LARGE, LANGUAGE IS A TOOL FOR CONCEALING THE TRUTH
George Carlin
George Carlin
It's always (well, usually... OK, hardly ever) my intention
to do a news page like every other website does.
I suppose I COULD do articles about the latest devices.. or report how Apple
is actually bragging about the amount of Kiddy-Litter they have to offer
in their store.
(Kiddy-Litter is my catch phrase for crap,
in the form of mostly useless APPS)
.....and I would, except for the fact that there seems to be no end to
human stupidity... in this case, in the mobile device area.
I find the funny pages to be much more interesting then the propaganda
they feed you in the "serious" news!
These articles would be funny if not for the fact... they're true..
(which explains my comment on "Human Stupidity!")
Someone has to do the dirty work.
Twenty Years ago, I would have said: "Get your head outa your ass.!"
Today it's: "Get your hand outa your head!"
I know it sounds a bit, uh, stupid right now, but IT WILL catch on!
So, as you read these pages in the weeks and years to come, if you find the
articles to be somewhat... stupid,
chalk it up to Earths "Higher Intelligence!"
The Silliest Most Rediculous Lawsuit Happening In Tech Right Now
Toy maker Hasbro just filed suit against Asus,
the maker of the excellent Eee Pad Transformer Prime tablet,
because it claims the tablet's name is too close to the Transformers character's "Optimus Prime."
Hasbro said in a statement:
Hasbro continues to aggressively protect its brands and products and the specific actions
we are taking today against Asus underscores yet again Hasbro’s willingness
to pursue companies who misappropriate our intellectual property for their own financial gain.
Personally, I'd say this is an "open and shut case for Hasbro! All they have to do is prove
that it's really easy for consumers to get confused by $500 Android-based tablets
and plastic toy vehicles that turn into robots.
BLACKBERRY'S PLAYBOOK TABLET
Tablets! They're all the rage and companies like Apple, Samsung, Toshiba, Sony,
Asus and Lenova can't get them out fast enough,
which is evident by all the different choices and for the most part,
the many things that are lacking from Tablet to Tablet!
But, then, this is really the first wave of this new product and we know from experience
it's going to take awhile before Tabletsare "ready for prime time!"
Another thing we should realize by now, going back to the beginning of time
(or at least recorded time) is that it's all in the packaging,
the marketing strategy."The Presentation!" (Just look what it did for JC!)
As with any successful marketing campaign, the main focus is
to tell consumers what they want to hear.
It's "State Of The Art." It'll make your life easier. You'll be more productive,
faster than a speeding bullet, more powerful than a locomotive,
it's... it's... Hype In Advertising!
Take those late night "Infomercials," for instance!
We've sold thousands of these for $100.00, but right now you can buy one for just 50 cents.
Order now and we'll throw in another absolutely free!
Now, there's only two things that can be going on here.
The owners were making so much money, they felt guilty and decided to give back or
they know the intelligence level of the general public is somewhere between
moron and idiot and if it sounds good you'll buy it!
The only thing that's changed in marketing is the presentation,
from scribblings on a scroll, to black and white, to larger than life 3D!
And, unless you're in the 3% who work in the corporate world (Big Business)
and actually use computers as a means of being more productive,
then you're on that list between moron and idiot! The General Public.
(generally speaking, of course!)
So, now that you know where you stand,
it's OK to admit that you have little to no idea
what "State Of The Art" means or what DVD stands for
and when you bought that new 50" plasma 3D HDTV,
you first realized, after hooking up the cable, plugging it in and turning it on,
that maybe you should have bought that service plan after all.
(Hey, honey? I think we're getting 3D reception.
Did you see the "rabbit ears" that came with the TV?)
You've been buying into the "machine" for so long,
you just naturally bend over and take it and don't ask questions!
Thank goodness for those GPS gadgets.
You're no longer part of the lost generation who took a wrong turn in New Jersey
and ended up in Kansas simple because you wouldn't ask for directions.
Now, you KNOW you're gonna end up in Kansas because that irritating voice keeps telling you so.
Maybe next time, you'll read the directions or ask someone how to work the damn thing.
OK! So, what's my point and what's this got to do with my review of The Playbook,
you ask?
(I always have a point. I just usually never know when I'll get to the point until I reach it).
First and foremost, I don't care how much you paid for it or what you think it will do
to better your life or make it more productive.
YOU BOUGHT A TOY.... (a very cool toy, but a toy just the same!)
And, if you believe that sharing Pictures, Music and Videos on a social network
makes your life more productive,
you should really consider asking someone for directions.
If you're reading this from Kansas, it's already to late for you
and the only productive thing left for you to do
is find the wizard and ask him for a brain!
If you're thinking of buying a Blackberry tablet, keep in mind,
it'll only work with a Wii-Fii router!
That means wireless and for most of you, that means asking directions!
The Playbook! While those other guys are starting to make a better product,
although RIM barely has a leg to stand on, BlackBerry still stands for Quality.
For a first offering, it lacks most of the **"Kiddy- Litter" the other brands offer,
and in my book that makes the Playbook a superior product.
The Playbook is exceptionally easy to set up
( with the exception of the "bridge" and Bluetooth which is still easy, just not exceptionally)
and it's like no touch screen you've ever experienced.
It's actually fun to use... a pleasure to navigate.
Even the keyboard proved to be excellent with all kinds of little hidden tricks.
The only down side for me is the lack of Themes.
There are more than enough apps and wallpaper to compensate for now, though!
The playbook takes multitasking to a whole new (and easy) level
and surfing the web was a breeze.
Watching videos were crisp and clear with a rich stereo sound.
If you're contemplating purchasing a Playbook in the very near future,
(or ANY tablet, for that matter)
consider waiting for the next new and improved wave.
If you're the kind of person who just throws money away, then I suggest
you throw it at me!
le click here to edit this text.
By JoJo Lawren
Talk On Your Phone Too Much?
Get An Ear Cushion For It
Get An Ear Cushion For It
Today is just full of brilliant ideas for the iPhone. Though technically,
this one works on many phones (they just chose the iPhone to demonstrate
how even a good-looking phone can be made hideous), not just Apple’s powerhouse.
This blight on your eyes is called the Earos, which apparently makes your phone more
comfortable to hold against your ear.
I don't know about you, but it takes an awful lot of talking on my phone
to actually make my ear start to hurt. Which leads me to believe there is
a cheaper alternative that will provide you with an even more comfortable experience.
I like to call it don't talk on the phone so damn much.
Seriously, if you talk on the phone for so many hours each day that you're thinking of adding a giant toilet seat-shaped accessory to your (now non-)mobile phone,
I think you might want to re-think what you're doing with your life.
this one works on many phones (they just chose the iPhone to demonstrate
how even a good-looking phone can be made hideous), not just Apple’s powerhouse.
This blight on your eyes is called the Earos, which apparently makes your phone more
comfortable to hold against your ear.
I don't know about you, but it takes an awful lot of talking on my phone
to actually make my ear start to hurt. Which leads me to believe there is
a cheaper alternative that will provide you with an even more comfortable experience.
I like to call it don't talk on the phone so damn much.
Seriously, if you talk on the phone for so many hours each day that you're thinking of adding a giant toilet seat-shaped accessory to your (now non-)mobile phone,
I think you might want to re-think what you're doing with your life.
Future Mobile Devices
Designed by Seunghan Song, this "window phone" concept will reflect current weather conditions on the screen.
To input text, you just blow on the screen to switch modes, then write with your finger as a stylus.
To input text, you just blow on the screen to switch modes, then write with your finger as a stylus.
Mac Funamizu's "Cobalto" has taken the cell phone concept way into the future, with an almost all-glass design.
The phone would feature 3D imaging that could make Google Maps even more useful, as demonstrated here.
The phone would feature 3D imaging that could make Google Maps even more useful, as demonstrated here.
If you are a sucker for eccentric, mind-boggling concept designs, you have the perfect gratification in the Leaf Phone, a model that could end up being the most practical gadget of the future.
It has been built with a strong understanding of modern day needs, while making sure it beats convention in every form.
Take for example, the design of the leaf. With the eco-revolution gaining ground, the best way to sell a product is by incorporating elements of nature in the design.
The ‘leaf’ in this case, hits the bull’s eye.
As far as ergonomics is concerned, you have a phone that understands the dynamics of your muscles.
Yes, it smugly fits around any part of your body without leaving you discomfited.
It has been built with a strong understanding of modern day needs, while making sure it beats convention in every form.
Take for example, the design of the leaf. With the eco-revolution gaining ground, the best way to sell a product is by incorporating elements of nature in the design.
The ‘leaf’ in this case, hits the bull’s eye.
As far as ergonomics is concerned, you have a phone that understands the dynamics of your muscles.
Yes, it smugly fits around any part of your body without leaving you discomfited.
(fOR tHIS wEEK......)
I think it's safe to say: The Cell-Phone Revolution has come and gone!
I talk to people everyday and NOT ONE of them has a clue
how to set up their device.
They're to busy enriching their lives sharing Photos, Videos and Music on a social network.
They don't even call it a phone or device. It's a DOA 012 or an RIP -11.
Welcome to the APP UPRISING
It's all about all those cool apps and
"Mine looks so hot!" (This'll definitely get me laid)
The way I see it, with the millions of mobile devices being used every day along with the proven fact that we're literally microwaving that 10% between our ears into oblivion,
it won't be long till we're back in the Stone Age.
The up-side to it is everyone will go back to Grunting!
And, I'm OK with that.
THE LESS SAID, THE BETTER!
The News is written with the sole discretion of JoJo Lawren
and does not necessarily reflectthe views of anyone else
and does not necessarily reflectthe views of anyone else
